A Tale From Camelot

Many legends have been passed down through the centuries. There are tales of daring do and magic and of great epics.

Perhaps the most retold tales involve Camelot, King Arthur, his famous Ronnd Table and the knights who served him.

Undoubtedly the most famous of the knights is Lancelot. While outwardly a model of chivalry, he is an internally torn and ultimately flawed being.
 

Perhaps his most recognizable role is that of paramour to Arthur's queen, Guinevere. Though the Queen's treatment of him at court is aloof and disdainful, according to the tenets of courtly love, their love runs deep and is lasting, though stormy at times.
 

As is the case of modern man, there were even in the days of olde those who were loath to admit they may not be quite as young as they once were and attempted to live a lifestyle perhaps best left to the younger members of society.

 

Lancelot was quite vain about this and rode off on quests long after he should have retired to a comfortable seat before a warm fire entertaining his grandchildren with tales of his exploits as a young man.

 

Unfortunately, the body is not always so forgiving of ancient warriors and Lancelot was no different.

 

After years of eating wild beasts of unknown species, often without benefit of fire to cook it, Lancelot developed what is now commonly known as “Irritable Bowel Syndrome” which not only caused him great discomfort but also an embarrassing amount of flatulence.

 

Years of riding a horse in complete armor and with his trusty broadsword at his waist ultimately led to Lancelot suffering not only from painful arthritis but also a condition known as “Restless Leg Syndrome” characterized by often uncontrollable twitching and involuntary spastic movement of his legs.

 

He frequently had to change positions as he sat trying to relieve the discomfort.

 

Unfortunately, his movement usually precipitated a prolonged period of flatulence.

 

Legend tells us that this explains the tendency of many of those around him to quickly move away when they saw the Knight shift.

(c) Tim D. Culey -2012-